A Whole Lotta Bullroar About Whatever!

Okay, here’s what I’m going to do: I have a limited amount of time, and I need to eat a snackie, or maybe some lunch, and my brain is so scattered that this morning I couldn’t remember my mom’s cell phone number. So we’re going to do a drive-by on all sorts of things that may or may not properly belong in the same post. Uno, Dos, Tres, Va!

Florida is resolved, the election is over, and Hillary lost. She is the only one who doesn’t know this, though there are reports that she’s calling all of her staffers to New York on Tuesday night to bid them adieu. Then she will have them killed. The delegates from both states will be seated basically proportionally, with the “uncommitted” delegates in Michigan (since Hillary was the only one on the ballot) being allocated to Obama. These delegates get one-half vote each, because when you break rules, there are consequences. Taylor Marsh, one of Hillary’s most obnoxious supporters, is bitching today about the, actual quote, “carnage” the DNC’s decision has “wrought.” Taylor is not THE dumbest Clinton supporter, mind you. THE dumbest one is Harriet Christian of Manhattan. Watch Harriet go:

CNN is reporting the following:

WASHINGTON (CNN) — Most of the seventeen Democratic senators who have remained uncommitted throughout the primaries will endorse Barack Obama for president this week, CNN has learned.

Sources familiar with discussions between Obama supporters and these senators tell CNN’s Gloria Borger that the senators will wait until after the South Dakota and Montana primaries to announce their support for Obama.

SO DO IT, boy howdy! My sweet Lord, I have had IV’s inserted while I was awake that have been more fun and less-drawn out experiences than this!

In case you hear Hillary saying something about winning the popular vote, a grown-up with a fancy calculator would like to debunk her lies for you.

The funniest moment of the DNC Rules & Bylaws meeting on Saturday (a phrase that should never have existed…funniest moment…of…DNC Rules & Bylaws meeting…) came when Donna Brazile decided to rebut the former Michigan governor’s belief that he was fighting for Hillary’s chances because of what his mother had taught him by educating the gentleman on what HER Mama had taught her, I dunno, something about PLAYING BY THE RULES? OKAY? Go, Donna, Go!

Macy’s has reacted to the California Supreme Court’s monumental and momentous decision to grant all couples equal marriage rights by being a smart, smart company, and they have released this ad:

There are rumblings that Joe Biden might be tapped as Obama’s Secretary of State, which would be awesome, though I think Biden would be best qualified to be the Secretary of Telling You What A Stupid Asshole You Are. But he could do that in State, though. One thing’s for sure: I want Samantha Power as involved in the Obama administration as she possibly can be. Speaking of Samantha, she gave the commencement address at Pitzer-Claremont College in California, and you owe it to yourself to read the transcript. Seriously, if you click on no other link in this post, give yourself the gift of Power’s words to those graduates. She is so brilliant, so funny, and so human. She offers advice that we should all take seriously.

In case you’re tempted to believe some Republican talking-head telling you how awesome things are going in Iraq, you should know that they’re not, and you should also know that the Rate of Violence [is] Skyrocketing in Afghanistan. Why did I capitalize that? Because it’s the headline.

What else, what else, what else…

Fashion icon Yves St. Laurent has passed away at 71. Wonkette points out:

Wonkette bows its head in solemn remembrance of Yves Saint Laurent, the man who brought pantsuits to the masses. Without him, women might never have discovered the glories of pants, and Hillary Clinton would be moping across Puerto Rico in a loud sarong.

So goes the creator, so goes the devotee. (No, she’s not going to die! I’m not a Hillary supporter for God’s sake…I don’t make assassination references.)

Ken Layne, the Wonkette editor, also has penned a wonderful article about stupid people who leave comments in ALL CAPS on blogs. He sets it up like this:

At this point, it’s incredible to consider that some people haven’t made up their minds. It’s incredible that Hillary is still drunkenly running for president of Earth, that Smooth Barry Obama has won the nomination but has to continue campaigning for it, that a senile old fraud like John McCain is the nominee of any major party, that delusional attention whore Ralph Nader is running again, that an anti-libertarian hack like Bob Barr is the libertarian nominee, and that the libertarian candidate (Ron Paul) is sitting out the race despite amassing a fortune in campaign contributions and a delirious following.

And he runs with it:

When space-monster archaeologists visit the ruins of Earth, they’ll find a very detailed record of the 2008 campaign, preserved in the browser cache files on millions of computer hard drives. They will marvel at three-paragraph AP stories posted on CNN that somehow elicit 500 comments that have nothing to do with the story. They will wonder why so many people who can’t type, spell or put together a coherent sentence nonetheless composed thousand-word freakouts about things they don’t understand. But mostly, the aliens will laugh at the outrageous idiocy that defined America’s voters just before the world ended.

In case you hadn’t heard Jenna Bush Hager and Laura Bush Hussein were on the Ellen show the other day and Ellen was very, very nice to them. Jenna even agreed to let Ellen and Portia use the ranch for their wedding. Laura didn’t comment on that part. The video is at Wonkette.

Gallup finds that a strong majority of Americans (including half of Republicans!) strongly support negotiating with our enemies. Which presidential candidate supports that again? Right. He absolutely must be the next president.

Oh, and in case you were worried something had happened over the weekend, rest easy, Michelle Malkin is still a stupid taint.

Have a blessed afternoon, my loves.