Dear Michelle Malkin: A Gherkin is a pickle, and you are a retard.
Michelle Malkin has nothing valuable to add to the intellectual discourse, and she’s a Republican, and the Republicans have nothing to run on this year besides “more disaster,” so instead she’s trying to make an issue of this Access Hollywood segment 60 Minutes segment, where Barack Obama makes tuna salad for his kids and uses Grey Poupon and something mysterious called a “gherkin.” Teh Malkin’s questions are twofold:
Who the hell puts Grey Poupon and gherkins (don’t ask me what those are, I have no idea) in tuna sandwiches for kids?
Maybe Barack the hell Obama puts Grey Poupon (which sounds expensive if you’re sucked in by marketing from 20 years ago, but actually is available at Kroger for like $2.99) and gherkins (which are pickles…and I think that’s a Midwestern/Northern thing — correct me if I’m wrong, people from that part of the country — using the specific word “gherkin” for pickles) in tuna sandwiches because Malia and Sasha like it that way. (?)
I dunno, Malkin. I hope you get your answer before you lose sleep over this.
Here’s my theory: Michelle Malkin is going after these videos because every single video of the Obama family together is completely endearing and shows what a close, normal familial bond they have with each other. The McCains may have that too, but it doesn’t come through in the same way, because they’re too busy being so fucking fake. Oh, also there was that time John called Cindy a “cunt” in front of reporters. That, too. (Can you imagine if Barack Obama had done that?) Anyway, here’s the video. It’s cute…
Update: A Malkin-defending commenter rightly pointed out that I, typing eleventy-billion words a minute, accidentally mixed the two media segments in referencing the tuna sandwich thing. I said “Access Hollywood” when I meant “60 Minutes.” My bad. I correct my mistakes when pointed out. Michelle Malkin is incapable of doing the same, because she’s an idiot who is very rarely right about anything, including this subject.
This entry was posted on July 8, 2008 at 9:51 pm and is filed under Election that will never end, Teh Stupid with tags Barack Obama, Cindy McCain, gherkins, Grey Poupon, John McCain, Malia Obama, Michelle Malkin, Michelle Obama, pickles, Sasha Obama. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
July 12, 2008 at 9:01 pm
Oops, now who is the retard. The tuna sandwich segment was with 60 Minutes. Access Hollywood was 4 segments showing off the Obamas as a family and interviews with his kids, but yet we the public ain’t suppose to say a word about Mrs. O.
I say you display your family or quote them or have them campaign for political gain – it makes them fair game
July 13, 2008 at 12:58 am
Oops, my bad!
Because typing really fast and writing the wrong show name is the same, really.
Once I correct my piece, Malkin will still be a retard.
After all, this is the woman who thinks Rachael Ray’s clothing is supporting the terrorists.